"No arms, but I’ve received many other things from God"
Born without arms, Borbála Ivicsics has been using her legs for everything since she was a baby. She knows no impossible, and once she sets her mind to something, she makes it happen: whether it's a scholarship abroad, driving a car, or living independently. Borbála graduated as a transport engineer and is studying to become a rehabilitation environmental designer. She works as an accessibility adviser at the Center for Budapest Transport and volunteers in several disability projects.
Do you remember the moment when you first realized that you were different from other children?
I don’t remember a definite moment. I'm sure I've been stared at, criticized, or made feel different, but I forget the bad things very quickly. My parents did everything they could to make me live a life like any other child. Even though they were advised to enroll me in a primary school for the physically disabled, they chose not to. I went to an integrated foundation school, the Children's House. Here I was given the opportunity to learn in a safe environment, but still not in a closed world. I went to high school in a Catholic institution.
Both my parents and my schools have helped me not to see myself as an eccentric, and to accept that there are things I am different in, or I function differently from other people.
Did having to use your feet instead of your hands cause you difficulties as a child?
From a very young age, it was natural for me to use my feet for everything, which is how I developed the fine motor skills of my toes. I can actually do everything with my feet, the most difficult thing is carrying things, but I always have someone to ask for help.
You can even drive with your feet.
It was my dream to drive. First I had to convince my parents, then I had to figure out how to make it happen. This required both my technical and English skills, as I started by browsing English-language sites on the internet about driving with my feet. On a holiday in Rome, I fell so much in love with the Fiat 500 that later, when I bought a car with the support of my family, I chose this model in snow-white with automatic transmission. A mechanic friend helped me to convert it. I steer with my right foot and operate the pedals with my left. I control the indicator with my head, it's attached to the headrest.
I've had people look at me bewildered from the bus next to me at red lights, but I don't think you can really see from the outside how I drive, and other drivers don't really notice that I wave with my foot when I let someone in the row in front of me.
Speaking of your technical knowledge, you graduated as a transport engineer. Why did you choose this profession?
I've always been attracted to technical things, and I did well in science, so there was no question about which direction I would go in. And I chose transport engineering because of my passion for aviation, with a particular interest in traffic management. After I graduated, I worked in this field for a short time, doing administrative tasks related to aircraft maintenance. But it soon became clear that this was not the job I really wanted, and I could not really develop. My life then took a completely different turn: for a year and a half I worked as an assistant event organizer on the preparation and implementation of the International Eucharistic Congress. Then I returned to transport, started my training as a rehabilitation environmental designer, and got a job as an accessibility officer at the Center for Budapest Transport. I've only been working here for a month, but I'm really enjoying it.
What you set your mind to, you put into practice, while striving for complete independence. Why is this important to you?
In many situations I need help, sometimes it's just more convenient or quicker to do something with help, but I don't want to be dependent on others all the time. While I was living at home, it was obvious that my parents would help me once they were there, but this also creates a dependency.
How did you become independent of your parents?
The first big step towards independence was an Erasmus scholarship to Warsaw. There I lived on my own for the first time. A girl came to help me once a week, otherwise, I did everything myself.
That semester was a real challenge but also a test of my ability to live independently.
I moved out from home after university when I started working. My parents come over once a week for a couple of hours, and I need help mostly with grocery shopping and household chores. I can clean up on my own, but it's much more time-consuming and tiring. Otherwise, my flat is designed so that everything I need on a daily basis is within easy reach and convenient.
Soon you will have new opportunities because you’ll have a helper dog. Where did you get the idea?
A friend of mine, Júlia Ernyey-Balogh, who trains assistance dogs, once asked me what I would say to a dog. The idea immediately appealed to me, because I had a dog as a child and I always wanted another one, but I couldn't imagine keeping one on my own. In the summer they chose the best one for me: Lira, the Portuguese Water Dog. There is a long list of things she needs to learn to become a service dog. When Juli feels the time is right, she will come to me, and together we will prepare for the exam for assistance dogs. Until then, I meet with Lira every week, get to know her, play with her and practice the exercises with her. I'm looking forward to having her not only because she'll help me with lots of things, turning off the lights, carrying my bag, fetching things, opening the door, etc., but also because I'll have a companion and I won't be alone. I'll definitely be going for a lot more walks, and going out with her.
You are involved in several disability projects. How did you become an activist?
When I was in high school or university, I was studying, and living the life of young people of my age. I sometimes asked myself whether I should be specifically involved in disability issues, but I didn't really think about it. Then, one by one, the different projects found me. One of them is Freekey, in whose campaigns I have been involved. The aim is to implement a personal assistance service in Hungary - which is already operating abroad - and we would like to draw the attention of decision-makers to this. There are many people with disabilities who need help, some for just a few hours a week, others on a daily basis.
Personal assistance would mean independence for these people, independence from relatives and institutions because the helper would go when the person wants them to, help them with what they want help with and they’d be able even to choose the helper.
I know someone with a disability who goes out with a helper. The other project I'm involved in is Nő az erőnk (” Woman is our strength” but also means “Our strength is growing”). This started with an online training where we worked in small groups. One of the tasks was to plan a campaign, our topic was women with disabilities. After the training, my partners and I, one of whom is also disabled, decided to implement it. On 8 March, we organized an online event for Women with Disabilities Day. It has been such a success that we have since submitted an Erasmus+ youth application to organize a workshop and joint photo shoot for disabled and non-disabled women, and we will also organize an exhibition of the photos. Our aim is to empower women with disabilities, make them visible and raise awareness of the problems they face. When people look at us, they should not see the disability first, but the woman!
In mid-September, you spoke and confessed your faith in front of three thousand young people at the Forráspont event. What did that give you?
It was a huge experience, I tried to ignore the fact that I was speaking in front of so many people. I've never felt qualified to give a motivational speech and was surprised when I was asked. I prefer to motivate others with my actions, with my life. People with disabilities to be open to a joyful life and other people to be accepting. Don't look down on us, get to know us, and see that it is possible to live a full life with disabilities, too! I may not have received something from God, but I have received many other things, which I try to manage well and use for the benefit of others.
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